blessings {counted}

In an effort to have a gauge of healing and a marker in time, 

counting the blessings.

recognition of how much i love and need my husband

many tears shed, while he holds my hand and cries with me

looking at him and knowing that he gets it

seeing that we are knit together because of this shared pain

watching him hold our son with such love

recognition of how much i adore these little girls

appreciating opportunity to be their mommy and carry their burden

laughing with them

admiring their innocence in these hard days

seeing how they love two brothers who they haven't even met

recognition of how much i appreciate our family

knowing that my mom and mom-in-law premeditate what we need

trusting both fathers to give needed wisdom

watching them share in our sorrow out of love

understanding that they wish they could take it from us

appreciating practical support with girls and chores

recognition of what amazing community we have

accepting countless expressions of love

appreciating meals cooked and delivered to us

admiring friends who help with and love on girls

appreciating friend who shopped for clothes i would feel good in

receiving notes of love and beautiful flowers

endless prayer support and encouragement

thank you, for being one of our blessings.

{note from Lila to me, written shortly after we knew we were pregnant in fall, 2012 - she was praying for a brother}